Cheated
by lindseyl0ve
Summary: Find out how James deals with being cheated on.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: Look who's back! haha, I'm sorry I've been gone for like.. two years. But I did adult things, like.. have a baby! But I'm trying to get back into writing, so here it is. Completely unedited, just written and posted. Let me know what you think please :3 Love you 3**

It was a brisk mid-October morning in Los Angeles. James walked down his porch stairs wearing a fitted gray pullover and dark washed jeans. He had his iPod in his pocket and ear buds in. It was time for his daily jog and post check. It was two years after Big Time Rush disbanded and the boys had gone their separate ways. Carlos was married to some big movie star, Logan was in Northern California working on becoming a vocal coach and hiking guide, while Kendall went back home. But hey, big surprise there. Kendall was a homebody and everyone knew that. James stayed in Los Angeles to become a big movie star, he also found a girl. He thought she was perfect, everything he could ever want in a girlfriend. A soul mate even.

After his three mile jog James reached his front step and pulled the mail out of the box. Just normal stuff, bills, spam, and a letter from Kendall.

_'Why is Kendall writing me a letter? Why didn't he call or text me? Ugh, I'll never understand him.'_ James thought to himself. He really did never understand Kendall, they were so different from each other in almost every possible way. Except for when it came to the loyalty of his family and friends, that is where he and Kendall saw eye to eye. The brown haired boy walked in the house while opening Kendall's letter. It was a thick letter, obviously very long, and had Kendall's sloppy penmanship. James sat at his kitchen table and began reading.

**James,**

**Hey bud, it's me. Y'know Kendall. Obviously. Wow, this sounds really dumb already. Whatever. Uh... how are you? How are you and Kaiden doing? Oh god I can literally read your thoughts already. You're probably wondering why I didn't text you, or call you, or email you. I'm just trying something new, well old actually. I'm staying away from phones for as long as I can and I'm writing everyone. Including my mom! I think it's pretty cool! Have you ever actually written a letter? It's not too bad. My hand is cramping really bad though, I have't written this much since school. And even then I didn't write a lot haha. I really want you to write me back though. Like tell me everything that you've been feeling and everything that is going on in your life. I want to know everything! Especially about Kaiden ;) I heard through the grapevine that you've been thinking about asking her to marry you! Why didn't you tell me bud? - Oops, probably should have told Kendall I bought a ring and was going to propose to her- I can totally help you think of a romantic way to do it dude, you know how romantic I am - Oh, like that time you and Jo went on a date and you dressed like a dirty homeless man? Yeah, real romantic. Idiot - Anyways. I've been doing really good, if you're you know wondering. Which I hope you are. I mean you probably already know of this. Coaching peewee hockey is a lot more interesting than I thought it would be. Oh, I started coaching peewee hockey last week. A lot of the kids remind me of us and Carlos and Logan when we were here. Is it weird that I hope some of them form friendships like we had? I just wish that everyone gets to have a friendship like ours at least once in their life. You know that friendship where you want to punch each other in the face all the time but you'll defend each other fiercely and indefinitely and punch anyone else in the face if they start something with one of us. Wow... that kind of sounded... really emotional and weird. Okay! Well! I got an apartment. I sign the papers next week. I think I forgot to mention that in Carlos and Logan's letters oh well. My mom is freaking out because I'm actually moving out haha. Katie is ecstatic though, she keeps telling my mom she's going to knock the wall between our rooms out and have a bedroom bigger then her's. You know how Katie is haha. It's definitely weird being back home. Nobody treats me like everyone in LA did. It's really nice though, LA was crazy. I don't think I would have been able to handle that much longer. **

**Alright well this is getting pointless and long so I will end it. How do you end a letter? Uh have a good day, or night or afternoon depending on when you read this. Please write me back!**

**Kendall**

What a weird, weird boy that one is. Does he really expect me to write him a letter? Do I even own paper to write a letter on? Oh great, now I'm going to have to go out and buy paper to write stupid Kendall a stupid letter.

James' phone started buzzing. It was a text from Logan, "Yo did you get a letter from Kendall too? Or is he just being crazy?" He smiled and texted back his letter experience.

"Baby are you home?" James heard the door open.

"Yeah, I'm in the kitchen. How was work last night?" James asked Kaiden with a smile. She was a beautiful girl. Petite, almost a whole foot shorter than James, bottle blond long hair, eyes the color of sapphires, and cheeks adorned with freckles.

The girl sat down in a chair next to James, clearly exhausted. "Oh it was fun, can you tell?" That was when James looked and noticed the blood stained scrubs. He made a disgusted face. Kaiden was a nurse at one of the many hospitals in LA and worked late night hours.

"I'm going to change, shower, and sleep until it physically hurts me." Kaiden stated with a sigh, James smiled at his girlfriend.

"Hey beautiful, do we have any paper? Kendall wants me to write him a letter." James asked down the hallway. Kaiden poked her head out of the bathroom door with a confused look on her face.

"Uh we might have some in the study, just look around." She answered. He nodded his head in understanding and went to on a grand adventure to find paper to write a letter. He opened the sliding wood paneled door that led to the study. It was filled with bookshelves full of medical books and Kaiden's books, James wasn't much of a reader, and a single desk with a shared laptop on it.

James sighed and looked around. Where could that damned paper be? He looked through the bookshelf for any notebook that wasn't occupied with medical notes in it, through the drawers of the computer desk. All he found was old Big Time Rush contract papers, miscellaneous pictures of the band, and random bills here and there. James sat down in the black swivel chair that sat in front of the computer and sighed with defeat. He decided he might as well check his emails while he was there and opened the computer. Kaiden's email account was open, which didn't surprise him. She had to constantly check her email for anything from work, and a lot of times her phone didn't notify her of anything new. The inbox was full, as always. James was curious this time though, what does she talk to her colleagues about? He had never asked before and always respected her privacy, but he was feeling nosy. He looked through and found an email from a Mike McCall with the subject: For Kaiden.

_What does Mike McCall have for Kaiden? Who is this Mike McCall? Fuck you, Mike McCall._

James never thought himself as jealous before, but something rushed over him as he read the line. Adrenaline rushed through his chest as he clicked the link and opened the email. He sat silent for what felt like lifetimes. James never opened people's email without permission. James never went into anyone's personal business. Why was he doing this? He felt dirty. Until he found the pictures. Pictures of Mike McCall half naked. Pictures of Kaiden half naked. James' heart sank into the pit of his stomach. He couldn't believe what he was looking at. All he wanted to do was find paper, not this. Anything but this.

James sat slumped in the chair staring at the computer. How could she do this to him? How could he have not known? He was going to propose to her! He stood up, shaking with adrenaline, and walked to their shared bedroom. He went to his underwear drawer and pulled out a small black box and opened it. A 3 carat diamond ring that he designed for, who he thought was, the love of his life. James walked out of the room and down the hallway to the bathroom and walked in.

"Kaiden." He said shakily, he was holding back tears.

"Yeah baby?" She asked from behind the curtain.

James was silent, he could feel his heart beating. It felt like it was going to jump out of his chest and die on the while tiles below him. "Who is Mike McCall?"

Kaiden was silent for a second and peeked her head around the shower curtain, "A colleague from work. Why?" She had a puzzled look on her face.

How could she just stand there and lie to my face? How could she have lied to my face all these weeks she's been sending naked fucking pictures to other men? "Because I know he's not just a friend from work..." His voice trailed. Kaiden's face fell and she turned pale.

"I don't know what you're talking about." She stated unconvincingly.

"Don't stand there and lie to me, Kaiden! I found those emails!" James was raising his voice, he never raised his voice. He was getting so angry, Kaiden looked scared. He looked at the box that was clutched in his fingers and threw it on the ground in the pile of Kaiden's dirty scrubs. "I want you out. Now."

Kaiden looked at the box and started crying, "James, please. Can we please talk about this? Please!"

James looked at her emotionless, "No. I want you out of my house now. I don't understand how you could do something like this to me. I don't want an explanation, I don't want anything. I just want you to leave." He left the bathroom and walked into the kitchen where he broke down. He couldn't believe that not fifteen minutes ago he was going through life thinking everything was perfect. And now everything he knew was a lie and his whole life was crashing down around him.

James sat in the kitchen for forty five minutes before Kaiden entered with a full suitcase and duffle bag.

"Are you sure we can't talk?" Kaiden's voice was low and hoarse, it was obvious she had been crying.

"No, Kaiden. God dammit. If you didn't want this to happen, or you didn't want to lose me, you shouldn't have sent naked pictures to other men. What is wrong with you? Just leave. Don't contact me, please." He didn't break eye contact with the sink across from him.

"Fine. Just fine." She replied slamming the front door shut.

The house felt so empty and the air was full of hurt feelings. James watched Kaiden walk to her car, back out of the driveway, and drive off. He wiped his running nose on his sweater sleeve and cleared his throat.

He stormed into the study and tore everything apart looking for that god damn paper.

**Kendall,**

**Everything fell apart. Everything. In the twenty minutes it took me to read your letter and try to find paper to write you back. You were right. I was going to propose to Kaiden. I just found out she was cheating on me. Sending fucking naked pictures to other fucking guys. Who the fuck does that? it took her forty five minutes to pack all her shit. The house looks so empty now. This house used to be so full of love, you could feel it when you walked in the front door. Now it's like someone died in here. I can't breath. I just am in shock right now. Absolute shock. I loved her. I'm so fucking stupid. Whenever anything goes right for me something fucking ruins it. I should have known better. I should have known. **

**James**

The paper was stained with tears but James mailed it off regardless. After sitting in his bare room he broke down again and called Logan.


	2. Chapter 2

A week had gone by since James kicked Kaiden out of his life and things were not going smoothly. He began going out drinking to get his mind off of her and he would come home and drink more. The house was dark all the time and you could feel the sadness and anger hanging in the air. It was finally when James' postman came to the door did James finally snap out of his daze. He opened the door looking haggard and reeking of alcohol.

"What?" He snapped.

"Uh, I was just checking on you. Your mail box is over filling, it appears you haven't checked your mail in about a week now. Just here to uh, give it to you." The postman handed James his stack of mail nervously and quickly left. James sighed as he closed the door and took the mail to the living room. He started sorting through it and found a letter from Kendall.

Stupid fucking letter.

He opened it anyway.

**James,**

**James, I'm so so so so so so so so sorry! I can't believe she would do something like that after being with you for so long! I can't understand the way you're feeling right now brother. I feel so bad. Just know that I'm here for you, please don't forget that. Please don't ever forget that I'm here for you. Please. **

James stopped reading. He couldn't handle it anymore.

_Everyone acts like they care. They'll just leave you for someone better. Because everyone is better than you. You're just a low life has-been who can't land a fucking job. Worthless piece of shit. _

He got up from the couch, mail falling to the ground, and went to his medicine cabinet in the bathroom. He couldn't handle the way he was feeling. He constantly felt like he was being punched in the gut while someone was trying to eat his heart out of his chest. He was done feeling that way. He decided enough was enough and picked up a bottle of Vicodin he had from when he got his wisdom teeth pulled. James took two of the pills and went to sleep.

James woke up feeling almost refreshed and happy, until he looked around the living room and realized how empty it still was.

_What time is it? Oh wow, it's only 8:00? I haven't been asleep that long... Monday? How could it be Monday? I thought it was Sunday..._

James realized he had slept for a whole day. He sighed with disappointment and went to get a shot from the kitchen. He needed something to wake himself up. He went back to the living room and looked at the pile of mail on the floor. He finished reading Kendall's letter and shook his head when it was nothing but Kendall apologizing, telling him how much he loved James, and how James could write him anytime if he needed anything.

**Kendall,**

**I just want to be left alone. Please.**

James' drinking continued every night and he soon formed an almost addiction like craving for Vicodin. He knew exactly that what he was doing was wrong but it made him forget about Kaiden, so why wouldn't he keep doing it?

He received letters from Kendall almost weekly for a month, but never replied. He was never conscience enough to reply. He had hundreds of missed calls and unread texts from Carlos and Logan worried about him.

It was a cold November night when James heard a knock at his door. He was sitting on his couch, half conscience, wearing a dirty tank top that he hadn't changed in probably four days, dirty pajama bottoms, his hair was a mess, and he had terrible five o clock shadow. The knocking persisted and James couldn't handle it anymore when the annoying unwelcomed visitor started ringing the door bell.

"What do you want?" James asked angrily answered the door with a bottle of Jack Daniel's in his hand. Before him stood his three best friends. They all looked concerned at the sight of their friend looking like he had just been hit by a train.

"James... may we come in?" Logan asked quietly. James glared and swung the door open for his friends. The three boys walked in and were hit in the face with a warm smell of whiskey and tv dinner containers that had been sitting in the overflowing garbage can for who knows how long.

"Why are you here?" James asked as he took his regular seat on his couch. Carlos looked around almost sad.

"We're here for you. You haven't been in contact with any of us in over a month, we're worried about you! And we were right to be." Kendall replied with an almost angry look.

James glared at his friend. "There's nothing to be -"

"Don't finish that sentence. Look, obviously you're not dealing with this break up well..." Logan interjected.

"Would you deal with it well!?" Carlos jumped back. "How would you deal with it if you bought an eight thousand dollar engagement ring for a girl and then you find out she's sending naked pictures to people!?" James shouted. The boys were silent. Kendall walked over to James and sat next to him. His friend looked sick, like he wasn't eating and losing weight.

"We're here for you-"

"Oh shut up." James angrily cut him off.

Kendall sighed and looked at Logan looking for answers, he always had answers. Logan gave him a look back as to say he had no idea what to do.

"Why haven't you been talking to any of us?" Carlos asked shyly. James looked at him like he just wanted them to leave.

"Why would I be? Why would anyone want to talk to me? What's the point?" He trailed

"We love you!" Carlos almost shouted angrily. He was astonished that his friend could think they didn't want to talk to him or not care about him.

"Now I want you to tell me right now what you've been doing this past month that is more important than talking to us!" Everyone looked at Carlos shocked. They almost never saw him this way, so demanding.

James rolled his eyes. "Well, I've been drinking-"

"Obviously." Came out of Kendall's mouth.

"Shut up, or I will make you leave." James shot him a glare. "And uh, I don't know. I've been sleeping a lot. I guess." Logan could sense something was wrong.

"Why?"

"What?"

"Why have you been sleeping so much?"

"To get over this! What else am I supposed to do?"

"That's not what I meant and you know that. Don't act stupid, I know you're not." Logan sighed, he was starting to get annoyed.

"Vicodin." James replied sheepishly. He knew there was no point in hiding anything from his friends, they would find out sooner or later and it would just be easier for everyone to tell them all now. He could feel all the disappointed eyes focusing on him.

"That's it." Kendall stood up. "You're coming home with me. That's final. You need to get the hell away from this place and come home. Let's go, go back your shit." He didn't mean to sound so rude to his friend, but he was angry. And he had every right to be. James was slowly killing himself and didn't talk to any of his friends about what was going on.

James looked around the room, "Are you serious? I mean, you can't make me go if I don't want to. And I don't want to."

"That's too bad." Logan said, agreeing with Kendall about the plan. James sat stubborn as a mule on the couch, obvious that he wasn't going to get up and pack his stuff. Carlos rolled his eyes and made his way to James' room where he was going to pack all of his friend's belongings for him.


End file.
